Perfect illusions ;

Safe and sound,

I’m really starting to wonder if i’m suffering from depression lol

Wah why am i feeling 987654321 times more stressed during the holidays than normal school days T.T Seriously, i just wake up every morning and think of ITC, interunit comp, unit cip, making sure all squads can finish syllabus before we ROD, squad outing, NDP, tuition outing, shiying’s CID camp and one whole stack of homework D,:

Have been and am still gonna wake up before 8am everyday although it’s JUNE HOLIDAYS == Feel so so so so so so so so tired ):

Took sec 1s for their second holiday act ytd and ya, 4 hours of PT was initially alright. But after being mentally + physically drained, we were not even halfway through the day yet :/ Went to have squad lunch at Mac while having a girls talk with shiying yijun and eelynn cos we were isolated from the ‘main clique’ due to space constraints LOL

After that, we went on our separate ways - and i followed shiying home!! HAHA i was excited about going to her ‘forbidden house’ while she was damn worried and stressed >< But yeappp, like what i said afterwards, i think her house really got the 家的感觉 cos of the many family portraits being hung up, some traditional types of furniture and her warm + friendly grandma xD So i showered at her toilet and felt super comfortable after being drained out from taking act ^^

Was blowing dry and tying up my hair while she went to bathe after that. Meanwhile i was 参观ing her room oso hahahaha, the childhood photos damn cool - yeap shiying you were super cute last time. But now cuter la hor friend LOL

4.15pm, we left her house sadly and rushed back to school with jialing. Our awesome squadmate Yijun aka our chio manager aka Muji helped all the girls tie scorpion and ensured that our hair was neat and tidy ^^ We had the catered dinner from Lee Wee Brothers (LOL) and proceeded to the audi to carry out our ushering duties for SE concert. Shiying and I were standing at the front door helping to give our programme booklets + tear the ticket thingyi. Then we were caught in this funny yet awkward situation when someone came haha shan’t elaborate on it

When the concert started, i thought we were allowed to go in to watch (cos that was what we were told) but sadly, cos the black chairs were not moved to the side of the audi + there were super lot of latecomers, we had to wait outside throughout the whole concert (without aircon) ._.

Oh well, but that’s the life of NPCC members right LOL still, we found someway to entertain ourselves which is~ GOSSIPING AS USUAL xD We sat at the stairs and talked about alot of stuff. Actually the convo was quite sad lor, yea.. Aish but it all became very funny when someone opens the audi door trying to enter or exit cos the eight (?) of us will stand up in a split second and get to our positions - it’s all about upholding our image right? Hahaha!

Oh! But there was this super funny uncle who walked in and said “Sorry sorry for interrupting, yall can carry on with your private conversation” and entered the audi. Like LOLLL super hilarious yet nice of him lor!

Finally, it was the end of the concert so we went back to our positions and said “thank you for coming”, “hope you’ve enjoyed the concert”, etc to everyone who walked out of the audi - so polite right!! xD Ya then there was this teacher who said “Thank you for all of your hard work” to us, so touchinggggggg :’D

Haha and yeap, we ended of the day by taking a few squad photos and going home tgt (: When i reached home, omg totally collapsed on the sofa with aching shoulders and legs :X went to bathe, came out, but fell asleep while sitting down to dry my hair == Didn’t even get to pack my stuff, comb my hair or even switch off the lights until my mom woke me up at arnd 2 am?

Still, i survived a long and tiring day with my squadmates.

TODAY MORNINGGGGG. Woke up at 6am feeling super blur zzz cos yucong eelynn and i had to meet ma’am huiqing at JP mac to discuss abt itc proposal. Anw, really glad that we did quite a great job ^^ The whole day chiong itc proposal at school was all worth it i guess..

Oh ya, my mom and youngest sis flew off to hongkong in the morning as well ): Will miss them but hope they enjoy the trip ba!!

Posted 1 day ago

And the silence sinks in,

What NP has taught me - Obeying upper authorities does not really mean that we agree with what we’re told to do. It’s just the minimal amount of respect that we’re showing them.

I guess I can really apply that to real life. Age isn’t directly proportional to maturity. A person with a higher say or rank doesn’t necessarily make the right decision at all times. So I strongly believe in reasoning. Even when cadets are of a lower rank, as long as they can substantiate their points and prove that their stand is right, I will stand corrected.

But I find that it’s really bullshit when we have to obey ADULTS (in general) just because they are older, and supposedly be more experienced in handling matters. Since this is the case, why not just explain yourselves when being questioned instead of just complaining that we’re being rude or not showing respect everytime, blablablabla

Sighs seriously. What’s wrong with the world -.-

Posted 5 days ago

So many answers i can’t seem to find,

Totally mentally exhausted after today. Reached school at around 9am to work on ITC proposal with yucong shiying eelynn and yonghwee. Poor us, chiong-ed all the way to arnd 6pm? ): We were sitting at the canteen blue tables area for the whole day that our butts hurt now == Hmm but our progress was not bad luh, current proposal has like around 100 pages now? :D

Anwwwww, there’s still act and muster parade tmr so hope i won’t oversleep :/ Happy for all those squadmates who got promoted (including yucong and myself too muahahahah) xD And for those who didn’t, hmm honestly… it may not seem very convincing coming from me but hey, promotions aren’t actually very accurate in showing how zai you are in RVNP luh. To me, it’s really all about the effort. I can be a private yet contribute the most to the unit right? So yeah lor, at the end of the day, we’re still gonna ROD as RVNP’11-12 NCO BUBBLETEA SQUAD. Not as individuals with different ranks. 

2 more months left. I really hope this round of results doesn’t affect us too much…

And anw, i think nobody in this world can define failure. So YOU! Don’t be too disappointed and cheer up k? Squadmates are always here for you~ :D

Posted 6 days ago

You’ll never know why i left,

Okay so although my sis sort of like did well for the audition, the director of the channel 8 children’s drama didn’t choose her in the end cos he said they need a mature-looking girl to play the main lead in the show and my sis like too young LOL oh well, wasted~ 

Hmm but they decided to use my house to film some scenes of the show and yeap, the production crew, some actors and actresses came ytd. Can’t rmb those artistes’ names though, too long nvr watch channel 8 shows >< haha! Not very famous ppl, but if you see them then cfm will know that they’re from mediacorp :D

So the filming started from 7am to 9pm, super noisy and they made a great mess of my house :/

They seriously turned my room into a… crime scene? :X

Haha cool experience for all of us though, got to witness how filming a show really works. THE DIRECTOR REALLY SHOUTS 3, 2, 1… ACTION! xD (damn funny when the actors NG oso) Yeap, that’s all for ytd.

And TODAYYY, felt that it was quite a long day ley. Got back most of the papers already and all not bad leh i think. But my GPA is gonna get pulled down by alot cos of previous term, urghhhh!

NEXT. 4 more holiday acts + ITC + a few more acts in july before our squad’s gonna officially handover and ROD. Aish. The feeling’s coming. Hahahaha, i’ll try not to cry when the time comes (:

Posted 1 week ago

Time stands still,

人与人之间的感情真就的那么脆弱吗…

Not the first time experiencing this today but yeah, why is it that whenever I try to include someone into a group, try to be the person’s best friend, we even talk or sms everyday but then suddenly. Just suddenly. That person will turn his/her back on me.

Is it really my fault? I shouldn’t have been a busybody and try to include them into a certain ‘group’ right. End of the day, they oso don’t realise why we’re not talking anymore. They oso don’t know why I’m not trying to 挽回那段友情 already

Haha, life’s so funny. Now I realise what people always say is true. Not only in BGR context but - 那个越对你好的人你就越不可能喜欢上

I’m always the former.

Oh well, but im no longer angry about this kind of stuff. Only feel a little sad and disappointed? No matter if it’s because of a certain person or reason that caused our relationship to become like that, I’ve decided not put myself through something like this again. Just appreciate the people who understand and are always there for me (:

I guess, 有些人真的是不值得我们为他们付出的…

Posted 2 weeks ago

Standing in the light of your halo,

In approximately 17 more hours, our misery will all be over. Feeling quite confident for chem but math, hmm… Lol I WILL SURVIVE TO ENJOY THE WEEKEND! :D

Had a fun time studying with Teacher Bhet and Student Ting at tuition centre just now hahahahah but it was quite productive leh, EH THANKS GUYS FOR HELPING ME PLAN MY SCHEDULE YEA. I’m gonna throw away my laptop in 5 mins time and start studying alr xD

According to Shiying’s theory, “You can stay up till as late as you want on thursday cos you can oso sleep for as long as you want on Friday night.” HAHA makes sense lor, so im seriously gonna chiong-mug tonight :D

And eelynn, hope our plan of being on a diet will last. Now i see food at home wont feel like eating alr leh yay xD Next week go gym together!! Then we can have a girls’ day out with shiying oso LOL

Posted 3 weeks ago — 1 note

This is the part of me that you’re never ever gonna take away from me,

This is only the second, yet oso the last NPCC day parade that our squad’s participating in. Filled with anticipation and nervousness today morning, but it’s all over now. Overall performance was not too bad, but not good either.

If I were to look at the positive side, I’ll be thankful that it didn’t rain today, no cadets fainted, Yucong didn’t zaoxia + I managed to deliver the NP day message and lead the NP pledge successfully. If I were to look at the negative side, hmm… Nvm forget it. I guess it’ll be enough to spoil my mood.

As for act, lol I was honestly quite disappointed with the sec 1 squad’s standard at first. Then I looked at them individually. Some ppl may not agree, but I thought almost 80% of the ppl in the squad were putting in their best effort to shout loudly and endure through the hot weather - worth commending.

After act, Yucong and I had AAR with Sir Tan. Really learnt and realised alot of things that can help improve the unit so ya. Guess we’ll have more things to do LOL

Counting down: 3 more months to ROD. Why is time passing so quickly :/

Posted 3 weeks ago

It’s echoing inside my head,

Went for tuition from 10.30 to 3 today as usual. After that qinping and I went to JP and met up with karissa and shiying (: we took 174 and gossiped throughout the whole bus journey LOL seriously, it was like half an hour non stop

So we arrived at this bukit batok plaza? Haha until now I oso dk the place xD but yes anw, we went to eat early dinner (we reached there arnd 4 plus) at this Italian restaurant which serves cheap pasta and nice food and free flow drinks.

WE STARTED OUR ROUND TWO GOSSIPING//CHATTING/CRAPPING for the next 2 hours - zai max. Think we talked about everything and anything in this world lol! Karissa and qinping are damn good at continuing the conversation. Yeappp so we laughed and ate and had lots of fun.

I ENDED A GREAT SUNDAY BY CHIONGING CHEM ASSIGNMENT AND STUDYING. Dk what suddenly mugger mode switch on heh

Posted 4 weeks ago